The girls are as fast as a game
Are as bright as a flame
And you're always to blame
The girls are as pink as the light
Or as dark as the night
But they're always right

The girls are as cold as the sphinx
Always dreaming of minks
They drive you to drink
The girls are as soft as a sigh
That whispers good-bye
And leaves you to cry

But the dogs well, they're only dogs
Just wagging their tails
As they watch it end
Oh, the dogs well, they're only dogs
And maybe that's why
They're man's best friend

The girls can make you feel cold
Can make you feel old
An antique to be sold
The girls they play with your heart
They tear you apart
You're never too smart

The girls they throw you from towers
They'll whip you with flowers
It depends on the hours
The girls will treat you like trash
Or let you be brash
It depends on your cash

But the dogs don't depend on a thing
They just lick your face
When they see it end
Oh, the dogs don't depend on a thing
And maybe that's why
They're man's best friend

The girls you know that they are vain
They will poison your brain
They will drive you insane
The girls will laugh at your jokes
How they love the coax
But it is all a hoax

The girls are still making dates
They still making you wait
And they say you are late
The girls are yours for a throw
At least you think so
Ah but you will never know

The dogs well you know the dogs
They lift up a leg
As they see it end
The dogs well you know the dogs
And maybe that's why
They're man's best friend

The girls they're not what they seem
They all have a scheme
They call it a dream
The girls are as hot as they please
And you're down on your knees
With the greatest of ease

The girls say you're on the right track
Then they take it all back
Tie it up in a sack
The girls they will give it of course
But they give with such force
That it gives you remorse

But the dogs they give nothing at all
All they can do
Is watch it end
Oh, the dogs they give nothing at all
And that's the reason why
They're man's best friend

And yet it's because of the girls
When they've knocked us about
And our tears want to shout
That we kick the dogs out...